About Last Night

June 5, 2019--On your travels, be open to meeting yourself. I think, sometimes, in the rush of life we fail to notice who we are or even who we are becoming. Today, I was reminded of some things...

I am on a cruise this week: Nassau was amazing😍

 The sun and breeze were just right, the blue-green water was therapeutic and totally healed my soul, and the people (my people!) are friendly and welcoming and work very hard to make the island feel like home. 

This cruise has been...an experience.

Last night while relaxing on a bench in the Promenade, gazing at the sea of people I met a 26-year old woman from India who is experiencing issues in her arranged engagement...the guy's family seems to be backing out of the deal and the guy is too, despite them being in love.

This afternoon, while frolicking in the beautiful ocean, I met an older woman who is going through a divorce. She just wants out and hopes 2019 is her year to settle things and move on with her life. We were in the water forever just laughing and talking about plans, travel, dreams.

Tonight I met a woman in her 70s from Columbia who spoke no English. Once again, I was sitting alone on the Promenade just relaxing and she came and sat beside me.  With my "poquito Español" I learned that she is a grandmother of 3, here on the cruise with her daughter, who lives in Tampa, and that she travels because she likes "to know, to touch, and to see". We sat and talked and laughed (!) on and off for at least an hour. It was so nice.

Last but not least, tonight before heading to my room I stopped to listen to the live music. While swaying to the band  I met a woman in high looove. She and her husband are employees on the cruise ship- she a hostess/guest service attendant, he a musician. While chatting with me she was also watching her husband play and it was so fun watching him throw her heart signs, kisses and smiles in between playing notes on his electric guitar. Me and her giggled like school girls and I sighed Yes (!) to the Universe.

In some ways, I saw a myself in each of these women. I saw the younger me in the woman from India, an ambitious me in the woman at the beach and I saw a wiser, peaceful, relaxed me in the Colombian woman. And you better believe I saw a blissfully married me in the last woman.

A few days ago I read a post by Pastor Sarah Jakes Roberts and it started off "If you see the woman I used to be..." And she went on to describe what to tell her past self and her future self. It was so profound and left me quite befuddled. What in the world would I tell somebody to tell my former self?! And what things could I send as a message to my future self?

Now, many days and many women later, I thnk I have an answer. If it makes no sense, please forgive me. I am still trying to work it out in my heart & head💝.

If you see the woman I used to be, tell her...tell her that she never quite got over her mommy hurt. That she still subconsciously looks for Mama in almost every woman she meets. Tell her that that empty part never fully went away. But she learned to stop trying to fill it up with people, food, sex, shopping. She learned to just stop trying. She learned to depend on Jesus. She learned that He is all she has ever needed. And He cares. Tell her she left her fears behind for great ADVENTURES abroad and at home. Tell her she found ways to do more with less and had lots of fun in the process. Tell her that her children are just fine. More than fine! They're thriving.  And though she has fallen more times than she can count, she is learning to love every moment. Tell her she experienced real love, passionate love (!) and she will never ever settle for less ever again. Tell her that she finally cleaned up her act and fully understands the power of obedience to the commands of God. Tell her she no longer negotiates--she trusts God instead.

And if you happen to see the woman I am to become,  give her a high five and tell her I said "Way to go, Sis!" Please tell her that I understand fully the sacrifices that have to be made today to enjoy the progress of tomorrow. Tell her I won't settle and I won't mettle.

So, I guess that's it. I'm still cruising and open to receiving any other messages God has for me.

I hope that this post resonated with you on some level. That you can see maybe some of yourself in these stories. We are all women just passing through each other's lives but we all have important messages to share.

Also, I think that every now and again we come upon seasons where God is clearly talking to us and we must be open to receiving these messages and acting on them.

When I opened the window of my notepad to write this message last night I was just journaling. I fully intended to record these thoughts in my journal. But then I kept typing and my entry became an entire message.

If it is not here for you already, the season is coming when you will be expected to use the knowledge you've been entrusted with for the good of others. The time will come where you will be expected to feed where you were only eating. Teach where you will only learning. Lead where you were only passively (and comfortably!) following.

I think this is my season for sharing. So, that is what I'll do.

Do you feel your season changing? If so, what do you think God is calling you to?